FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
(Los Angeles) - Sept. 15, 2006 - The savings continue for Alicia Sanchez Stavros, the "Genius of Marketing" and Impressario of Infomercials. We still have a few items left from the Stakgold Summer Sale as we move out inventory for our Winter season. Enjoy the greatness (and humility) starting Saturday at all Taco Chicasitos, Chico's, El Pollo Loco's, Hustler Superstores, Kingsberry's Kotillion Pavilion, the LA Free Clinic and the Encino Jewish Prostate Center.
Act now and enjoy the bargains!
STUPID LOOKS: (SOLD OUT)
DISMISSIVE WAVES: Was $69.99, now $29.99
PHOTOS OF ALISSA WEARING I'M WITH STUPID T-SHIRT: Alone, $99.99; Signed, $159.99, next to you, $299.99
LISTENING TO HER COMPLAIN ABOUT MICHAEL: $39.99 per hour
LISTENING TO HER DRONE ON ABOUT DRESSAGE: $4.99 per hour
ROLLING HER EYES: $39.99 each
ROLLING HER EYES AND PRETENDING SHE'S NOT: Priceless!
PRETENDING SHE KNOWS WHO YOU ARE: $79.99
PRETENDING SHE KNOWS YOUR NAME: $119.99
PATRONIZING STARES: (SOLD OUT)
TALKING TO YOU WHILE EMAILING ON HER BLACKBERRY: $12.99 per minute
CHANGING THE SUBJECT: $20 per incident
COMPLAINING ABOUT HER CLIENTS: $3.99
TELLING YOU YOU "JUST DON'T GET IT': Free with every purchase of $200 or more
So act now and enjoy the savings! And the greatness!
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1 comment:
Is there anyway I can get a few of the Patented Stakgold Harumphs? (You know, that sort of "Hummph!" sound she makes) or did they sell out with the two-for-one offer on dismissive waves? I thought they would make make great stocking stuffers.
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