Where's My Pants?

For Immediate Release

(LOS ANGELES) - Alissa Stakgold, president and CEO of the Stakgold Group, formerly Stakgold & Associates, has announced production of the new theatrical presentation.

"Where's My Pants?" opening in April at the L'Chaim Theatre at the B'Nai Brith center of Sherman Oaks, stars Stakgold herself as Tushy LaFinklestein. Stakgold plays a sensual yiddish 29-year-old who gets mixed up with a rabbi, a gang banger, two transvestites and a traveling salami salesman.

"I've had this farshtaist cockamamie idea for years," said Stakgold, who will produce through her Stakgold Entertainment Group. "I'm no Chaim Yakel but I've been dealing with enough nebbishes to know a schmendrick who gives me narishkeit."

Stakgold will also direct and life size posters of her will be distributed through synagogues, yamukkah shops and kosher delis throughout the greater Encino-Sherman Oaks area.

Noted Jew Michael Rogers said he was excited about this once in a lifetime opportunity. "Huh? Oh yeah, sure I'll go. I guess. I probably have to or Alissa will kill me."

"This should be the most wonderful Jewish production of all time, better than Fiddler on the Roof" said Beverly Hills socialite Kingsberry Kotillion. "How was that, Mistress?"

"You should have told everyone I'm a giant radiating beacon of talent and love, god-dammit!" Stakgold said. "Don't make me farbissiner you schlemiel."